Your value is an accrual of experiences! Embrace the good, the bad, the ugly and the downright complicated to awaken your joy!
– Mary Tess Rooney
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EP210: Practice Gratitude
Often, when I coach a client, we begin the session with three breaths. These breaths are meant to align our rhythms and heartbeats, and to allow us, as individuals, to release anything that happened before we came together.
The words I use while we inhale and exhale together may vary. Sometimes I’ll say, “Let’s take a nourishing breath,” or “Let’s take a grounding breath,” or even “Let’s take a restorative breath.” These words change based on what I sense in the moment, but I love the idea of taking three breaths because it centers me and connects me with my client. It also sets the intention to be fully present and hold a safe space for one another.
I always appreciate that clients respond positively to this practice. They might be rushing to meet with me or dealing with something that happened earlier, so this moment of breathing gives them time to regroup.
In addition, if my client is going through a big life transition or something heavy, another practice I may incorporate into our conversation is a practice of gratitude.
On today’s Wise Walk, I thought we could slow down, check our reality, and ask ourselves these questions:
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- Do you have a daily practice where you slow down, connect with your breath, and practice gratitude?
- Can you start to incorporate a practice of gratitude to help you move through life’s heavy moments?
- As you look at your day, or you look at the coming weeks, is there anything that you have anxiety about?
- Is there anything that feels a bit heavy for you?
- What can you do to incorporate a practice of gratitude to help you move through transitions with a little bit more inner peace?
- What are some ways you can practice gratitude on a daily basis?
- Do you journal? What am I grateful for at this moment?
- Would you rather practice gratitude in the morning? Do you have a cup of coffee and just allow yourself to be present in the moment?
- Can you put where you feel aligned and blessed into words? Can you hold that sentiment in your heart to practice gratitude in whatever way feels aligned for you?
- Do you have what you need? What is really supporting you?
- Who is in your life that you feel grateful for? Can you tell them?
- What are some of the things that you experienced today that you feel grateful for?
- What are some things that you’re looking forward to that are going to support you on your journey?
I am so grateful for each and every one of you. You continue to surprise and delight me. I received some great feedback from the last episode, and I’ll be reflecting more on it. So, thank you again. I’m also feeling thankful that my power is back on!
I will hold you in my heart as I practice gratitude daily, and I look forward to our next conversation on Thursday. Please join me again for next week’s Wise Walk. Until then, be sure to practice gratitude, prioritize fun, read the signs, direct your path, and get your stride.
In this episode:
[04:53] This past week, Florida, and a lot of different states, Georgia, North Carolina, South Carolina and some parts of Tennessee, were impacted by Hurricane Helene.
[05:17] It was intense with a lot of stress and emotions.
[06:01] I live in Northern Florida so I wasn’t directly in the path, but we still experienced high winds, tornado warnings and lost power.
[06:40] Practicing gratitude really helped me take the storm in stride. I know I am very blessed. Practicing gratitude helped me feel all the positives that I had in that moment, and that I could take that with me wherever I went.
[08:11] Everything is relative. “The miracle of gratitude is that it shifts your perception to such an extent that it changes the world you see.” – Dr. Robert Holden
[11:48] Practicing gratitude has multiple health benefits from boosting your immune system, increasing red blood cells, and even decreasing stress.
[12:50] Practicing gratitude can even help reduce pain and depression.
[14:08] A lot of times we pay attention to what’s not going right. If we can flip that script things will go better for us.
[14:45] A grateful mind is a great mind.
Memorable Quotes:
- “I love this idea of my clients taking three breaths, just because it centers them in the moment, it connects them with their breath.” – Mary Tess
- “Mother nature, who is unpredictable, and strong, and beautiful, but can also be destructive in different ways, so we have to adjust to the elements.” – Mary Tess
- “Practicing gratitude really helped, ground and center me in this moment of changing my perspective and helping me move through the heaviness.” – Mary Tess
- “Practicing gratitude helps reinforce our brain’s ability to get to a place of gratitude easier, and reconnect or revisit those emotional experiences that elevate us and boost us.” – Mary Tess
Links and Resources:
EP209: Selective Sharing: Protect Your Emotional Wellbeing
Are you facing a significant life decision or transition? Do you hesitate to communicate your goals with loved ones for fear of their reactions or unsolicited advice? Today, I’m talking about something that’s been on my mind a lot lately: how do we deal with major life transitions without letting everyone else’s opinions throw us off track?
I’ve been thinking about when I decided to relocate to California in 1997. It was a significant move for me, but I was astonished by how my friends and family reacted. How do we defend our dreams and decisions when everyone else has an opinion?
I’ll share some personal anecdotes and insights I’ve gathered over the years on creating appropriate boundaries, particularly while we’re going through huge life changes. Whether you’re thinking about changing careers, relocating to a new place, or making any other significant change in your life, I have some tips that will help you stay true to yourself while maintaining vital relationships.
I’ll explain how I’ve learned to control my own emotions and deal with our loved ones’ well-intentioned (but often overwhelming) concerns by practicing selective sharing, because not everyone needs to know everything all the time.
If you’ve ever been caught between following your aspirations and satisfying others’ expectations, or if you’re now experiencing a significant life shift, this Wise Walk is for you!
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- Where in your life can you hold a healthy boundary to protect yourself from outside influences?
- Can you move closer to a dream you hold in your heart in a way that feels aligned for you?
- Are you experiencing something right now, like a big transition or a big life change that has been put upon you?
- Are you noticing that there are certain people in your life that you can be transparent with, because they don’t push their emotional state on you?
- Are there other people where you being more reserved is a better boundary?
- Can you give yourself permission to allow for that space?
- Where in your life have you felt supported by going inward and making sure that you quiet the external voices?
- Can you hold space for your own emotional needs?
- Do you know what your emotional needs are?
- Do you know what’s calling you?
- Can you put up a boundary to protect those needs and very gently keep everyone else’s emotional needs outside?
I invite you to boldly set boundaries and selectively share based on your emotional needs. It’s healthy to keep things close to your vest if it protects your wellbeing until you’re ready to share.
I would love to hear what you took away from today’s episode. Reach out if it feels aligned for you. Be sure to tune in to next Thursday’s Wise Walk as you prepare for any transitions that are happening in life.
Join this inspiring community to uncover a new sense of freedom, and be sure to follow and review the True Stride podcast as we continue to exchange our light and Heart Value with each other.
In this episode:
[04:51] The move I made to California was one of the best decisions that I made.
[05:24] The distance and space allowed me to figure out what my interests were and what I liked to do.
[06:55] I was clear on understanding my emotional needs, and I knew I needed to travel and go live in a completely different environment.
[10:00] A story about one of my clients going through a major life transition.
[11:24] Sometimes we need to insulate and protect ourselves and make sure we manage our own emotions.
[12:15] Are you only sharing when it feels aligned?
[14:44] A story about my mom’s amazing wit and how we came to healthy boundaries.
[16:43] We each need to live our lived experience without pressure from outside forces. We get to decide what gets shared and to whom.
Memorable Quotes:
- “It was also a beautiful expansion of the fact that we can create family outside of bloodlines. I love that when we expose ourselves to different environments, we can grow.” – Mary Tess
- “I was not responsible for their emotional needs. We can have our emotional needs, and we can recognize someone else’s emotional needs or desires for us, but it’s always important to create a healthy boundary during times of transition.” – Mary Tess
- “Sometimes we naturally know that we can’t share everything that we’re going through with everyone that loves us or that we love, because that might stir up emotions that are not helpful.” – Mary Tess
Links and Resources:
EP208: Connection Through Stories with Shanti Joy Gold
One of the core principles in my book Heart Value is about aligning with humans that appreciate you and the value you share that lights YOU up. Yes, your heart-centered value is so important to you and others when you share an energetic and emotional connection with each other.
We all have value that lights us up, and we have value that benefits or pleases others, but makes us cringe inside. Yes, it may pay the bills or fulfill other purposes. We’ve all done that too. But wouldn’t it be magical if we could align the value that truly excites us with people who appreciate it—and pay us for it?
I have a special guest today: Shanti Joy Gold.
Shanti spent a couple of decades in corporate leadership roles, where she excelled. She successfully coached sales executives and teams to achieve both personal and professional goals. She’s been responsible for managing multi-million-dollar budgets at top national and international companies and has been recognized for sales and women in leadership achievements.
We worked together in the corporate and coaching worlds. She’s here today to talk about how she found the niche that lights her up, along with her new podcast, Stories We Haven’t Shared, which focuses on helping people discover and tell their authentic stories while finding their true selves.
I’m thrilled to take this Wise Walk with Shanti as we explore how sharing your story can lead you to meaningful work that truly ignites your passion.
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- Where in your life have you felt the contrast of sharing value that brings you joy or sharing value that depletes you or lacks excitement?
- Who are the individuals in your life that bring you excitement and joy?
- Are you eager to have conversations with them? Or do you feel a little heavy like there’s a disconnect?
- Do you feel like logically that audience should be your audience? Is something missing that you can’t ignore?
- Are you taking stock of your own presence every single day? Are you nurturing yourself with practices that help you stay aligned? Are you honoring the things that come your way?
- When they don’t work out the way you want, are you releasing them?
- Where in your life can you get more in touch with your story?
Tune in next Thursday when another episode drops. Until then, please be sure to prioritize fun as you read the signs, direct your path, and get your stride on!
In this episode:
[03:42] Shanti Joy Gold spent a couple decades in corporate sales leadership roles. She’s now a coach who helps LGBTQ and underrepresented people thrive in their careers.
[04:29] She’s now starting a podcast that speaks to this audience as well as allies through the medium of storytelling.
[05:03] She loves the outdoors and connecting with people who align with her energy.
[06:22] After a couple of years of soul searching, things clicked for Shanti about who she really wants to help through her coaching and her upcoming podcast.
[07:36] She was planning on basing her coaching on her lived experience. Her first thought was to focus on high achievers then she realized that helping LGBTQ people live authentically was more aligned with her calling.
[12:19] Becoming more authentic includes pausing and having that conversation with yourself.
[14:44] Practices for keeping your frequency high include leading and focusing on the steps that feel exciting and eliminating the ones that don’t.
[19:57] Looking back, ask yourself if that moment will matter.
[23:30] Mindset shifts and knowing that the Universe has your back.
[27:56] Finding a practical way to tap into what your heart is telling you.
[31:39] Shanti shares a little about some of the inspirational stories that will be featured on her podcast.
[38:19] Storytelling is powerful. Part of what is important is to take the time to consider your own story first.
Memorable Quotes:
- “Grab a surfboard and just get up and surf and flow. The whole idea is that life is unpredictable and that change is inevitable. There’s so little that we actually control. Be energized by that versus taking the waves head on.” – Shanti Joy Gold
- “I love this idea of being in flow and just not resisting what is unfolding for us and trusting the process. I know the universe has my back.” – Mary Tess
- “There is a deep inner knowing that will reveal itself as long as you surround yourself with people that don’t judge.” – Mary Tess
Links and Resources:
EP207: When Simplifying is Complicated
I’ve been on a simplification kick, and the funny thing is that, ironically, simplification is very complicated. A friend took off work to evaluate her home and determine where she could streamline, free up some energy, and reallocate resources, focus, money, or space in her life. We were chuckling at just how hard it is to simplify and how complicated the process can be.
So for today’s wise walk, I thought we could slow down, check our reality, and ask ourselves these questions.
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- In what areas of your life could you benefit from simplifying?
- How does it make you feel?
- What is involved in freeing yourself from that situation, thing, person?
- What are the ways you can dedicate time and space in order to simplify and move through that complicated process?
- What are your bare minimum essentials? What brings you joy?
- What are the things that really matter?
- Where can you clear out the clutter and find clarity?
- Why is simplifying this thing important to you?
- Have you listed out all of the steps to move through the complicated period so you have the freedom to honor your why?
- What is taking up space, time, energy, resources in your life?
- Can you shift or simplify to gain energy, resources, space for what is calling you?
- What is causing you stress or keeping you up at night?
- What are you worried about or what is holding you back?
- Can you create a plan in order to help alleviate that stress and leave space for what matters?
What I wish for both of us is that we can simplify and laugh at how complicated simplification is, because it’s not for the faint of heart. But we’re in this together, and we’re going to support each other.
I’d love to hear what you took away from today’s episode or which areas you’re trying to simplify and what’s your why. I hope you’re laughing while steadily making progress towards your successful outcome.
Join this inspiring community to uncover a new sense of freedom, and be sure to follow and review the True Stride podcast as we continue to exchange our light and Heart Value with each other.
Tune in next Thursday as we go on another wise walk. Until then, please be sure to prioritize fun as you read the signs, direct your path, and get your stride on.
In this episode:
[01:08] It’s surprising how complicated and difficult simplifying can be.
[02:23] How a city in Belgium gave 2,000 families three chickens each, resulting in a one-ton reduction in the landfill.
[03:16] If you ask these families, this simplification process was probably complicated to start.
[04:38] It’s important to remember that when we’re in the process of simplifying, it will feel complicated at first.
[05:06] We need to give ourselves space and grace for mistakes.
[05:35] Simplifying is our way of clearing the way for better visibility and clarity.
[06:24] One of the things I’m doing is getting rid of one of my vehicles.
[08:38] Selling my camper van is one example of how simplifying is super complicated.
[12:21] A story about a friend returning from London and the questions I asked her and what inspired her to simplify her life.
[15:10] I share some of the areas in my life that I have been evaluating when it comes to simplifying.
[16:14] I’m also trying to simplify my energy levels.
[17:35] There can even be unexpected expenses related to simplification.
[19:04] Be kind to yourself and take small steps.
Memorable Quotes:
- “I think it’s really important for all of us to remember that anytime we are on a mission to simplify, we’re going to feel the complicated first.” – Mary Tess
- “We have to move through this process of heaviness in order to fully release what is weighing us down.” – Mary Tess
- “We might be super motivated, but there also might be a lot of steps involved in order to achieve success in the way that we envision.” – Mary Tess
Links and Resources:
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EP206: The Difference A Year Can Make
I’m approaching a big birthday milestone. Yes, yours truly is going to be 50 – the big 5-0. While I feel very young at heart, this turning point in my life feels big. It feels like a major milestone to appreciate, and to be intentional about how I shape this next chapter.
Birthdays have always been a big deal to me. I love to take myself on Wise Walks to reflect on what I was doing last year, who I was with, what my priorities were, and how I was feeling. I’ve always looked at these birthday milestones as a way of reflecting on whether I’m moving in the direction I want to go.
So, no surprise, I’m doing the same here. But it feels intensified because I’ve experienced more life than I might have ahead, and I want to honor all that I am and will become.
For today’s Wise Walk, I thought we could slow down, check our reality, and ask ourselves these questions:
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- What milestones or time frames do you go into deep reflection?
- When you look back at the past year, do you set intentional plans for your future?
- As you reflect, do you approach it from a place of gratitude?
- Are you grateful for the hardships you’ve overcome and the wins you’ve accomplished this past year?
- Do you honor the good, the bad, and the ugly to realize how far you’ve come?
- How do you use this moment to stand strong in your own evolution?
- Do you recognize that your future can be more meaningful because of your past experiences?
- As you reflect on the past year or a big milestone, what difference has that year made?
- What things immediately spring to mind when you look back?
- What aspects of your life feel super aligned for you?
- Where are the areas where you’re getting stuck or feeling pressure?
- Are there situations where you’re saying “yes” to please others, but inside it makes you cringe?
- How can you give yourself the freedom and confidence to express your needs?
- How can those who love you, support you in ways that truly matter?
I invite you to reflect on your own journey and set intentions for what’s calling you. As a birthday gift, I’d love to hear about your growth, what’s matters most to you, or how these Wise Walks have impacted you. If you’re willing, please leave a review on iTunes to help others discover the True Stride podcast.
Thank you for being part of this community. Your self-reflection and growth inspire us all. I look forward to our next wise walk – I’ll be a bit older by then, but hopefully wiser too. Until next Thursday, keep striding forward.
In this episode:
[03:35] I have a friend who uses her birthday to reflect on where she’s been and where she’s hoping to go.
[04:06] It can be a time of renewal based on the seasons or any other time you choose.
[04:23] For this Wise Walk, I ask you to get clear on your time frame of renewal. What are the presents you can give yourself?
[05:24] One gift I can give myself is a consistent meditation practice. And so I am going to challenge myself to meditate every day.
[06:26] When I reflect back on my 49th birthday I was in a very different place.
[07:30] I’m grateful that I listened to my body, and I’m grateful that I found a great medical team.
[09:03] There’s so many things to do with friends and get together without it revolving around food and drink.
[10:11] I love that I’ve been able to communicate, express and set healthy boundaries to support my habits and ways.
[12:36] We can be our unique individual selves and honor those around us.
[14:10] Honoring my body and my truth was the best gift I gave myself last year.
[15:49] Meditation can be more successful after moving your body.
[17:14] I’m also going to explore different types of meditation to keep it interesting.
[20:04] You presenting yourself with presents teaches everyone else how you are worthy and deserving of gifts.
Memorable Quotes:
- “I’ve always kind of looked at these birthday milestones as a way of reflecting on… am I moving in the direction that I want to go.” – Mary Tess
- “We all have these just internal clocks for us to appreciate how far we’ve come and also awaken to what matters right now.” – Mary Tess
- “We have the ability to honor and give ourselves gifts that are really speaking to our heart.” – Mary Tess
Links and Resources:
EP205: Shining a Light on Beacons
Recently, I’ve been on a fitness kick, incorporating yoga, strength training, walking, and even some hula hooping into my routine. As someone who prefers outdoor activities to gym workouts, I’ve been exploring different ways to stay active while enjoying nature.
My sister Heather, who’s also been focused on well-being and fitness, joined me in an interesting adventure. We decided to climb the St. Augustine lighthouse – all 219 steps of it, reaching a height of 165 feet.
The experience was more than just a physical workout. Standing at the top, with the powerful wind and panoramic views of waters, landscapes, and buildings, I was struck by the profound purpose of lighthouses. These structures serve as beacons, guiding ships safely through potentially hazardous waters and helping them navigate to their destinations.
This realization led me to reflect on how we, as individuals, can act as beacons in our life and other’s lives. We have the ability to shine a light on challenges, offer guidance through difficult times, and illuminate paths forward. Moreover, like the phrase “beacon of hope” suggests, we can also highlight and celebrate the positive aspects of life.
For today’s Wise Walk, I’d like us to take a moment to consider this metaphor. Let’s explore some questions about how we embody the qualities of a lighthouse in our personal and professional lives.
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- In what areas of your life do you feel like a beacon?
- Do you shine a light to illuminate hazards and dangers?
- Are you shining a light to illuminate areas to celebrate?
- As you notice what becomes your tendency, how does that make you feel?
- What are you training your brain to do, and how does that resonate with you deep in your heart?
- Does being a beacon feel aligned to you?
- Where in your life are you pushing yourself too hard?
- Could you benefit from a beacon of reason or beacon of releasing expectations?
- What intentions are you setting and how are you making sure that you enjoy the win?
As we wrap up today’s episode, I hope you take some time to reflect on the beacons in your life. Consider what type of beacon you want to be for yourself and for those you love. Also, think about who around you acts as a beacon, safely guiding you through life’s ups, downs, and everything in between.
I’d love to hear what you took away from today’s episode. Go ahead and flash some beacon light my way! I look forward to our next wise walk.
In this episode:
[04:23] I share a story of a coaching client who was responsible for quality assurance. Always on the lookout for problems, and it weighed on others.
[05:06] If all you see is problems, then you help others see hazards and navigate around them.
[05:42] Train your brain to be a beacon of celebration or a beacon of warning.
[06:24] Both spectrums are equally valuable. There are times when we need to be a beacon of warning and awareness.
[07:22] We have the ability to be a beacon of hope and inspire someone that’s in despair.
[08:03] We have to pivot, evolve and change with life or the tides of life.
[09:47] There is also a beacon of reason that reminds us to slow down and celebrate what we did today.
[10:46] It’s important to be a beacon of reason and not burn out.
[12:00] The lighthouse has brought so many individuals to safe harbor, and you can feel the energy.
[12:43] We enjoyed the win without overdoing it.
[13:09] Sometimes it’s about releasing unrealistic deadlines or expectations.
Memorable Quotes:
- “We don’t have to be in a lighthouse in order to shine a light and bring awareness to challenges or difficult times or rocky waters.” – Mary Tess
- “We train our brain either to be a beacon to avoid disaster or a beacon to celebrate, to be a beacon of hope and light and reassurance, a beacon of comfort even.” – Mary Tess
- “There are times where we need to be a beacon of warning and awareness and make sure that we safely guide ourselves or others to safe harbor.” – Mary Tess
Links and Resources:
EP204: What’s Fueling Your Mood?
Have you ever taken the time to ask what’s fueling your mood? In our last episode, we explored the powerful concept of retreat – recognizing when we need to step back, regroup, and realign our energies. Your feedback was incredible, and a common thread emerged: many of you resonated with feelings of heaviness.
Today, we’re going to explore this shared experience. As someone who’s personally navigated through periods of feeling stuck or depressed, I understand the weight of these emotions. Over the years, I’ve developed strategies to shift my energy in a more positive direction, and I’m excited to share these with you.
In this episode, we’ll slow down, check our reality, and focus on what’s fueling our moods. Join me as we embark on another Wise Walk, exploring practical ways to lighten our emotional load and move forward with renewed purpose.
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- What is fueling your mood right now?
- What sounds, environments, or stimulations are impacting your mood?
- How are outside influences or noises affecting your energy and mood?
- As you notice your mood shifts based on the stimuli around you, what are you doing to be intentional about what you listen to?
- As you reflect on this past week, what are the things you are inviting into your life that have been affecting your mood, whether that’s positive or negative?
- What are you doing to change the channel if whatever you’re absorbing or whatever is being pushed upon you is negatively affecting you?
- How can you shift your energies outside of the influences, noises or situations around you, and can you make a better choice for yourself?
- What events are coming up or occur regularly in your life?
- How can you incorporate fuel to enhance your mood or create desired experiences?
- As you incorporate voices or tunes, how do they nourish you and affect your mood?
- Do you give yourself permission to tune out misaligned influences or uninvite others to be more intentional about what fuels you?
As we conclude our Wise Walk today, I encourage you to be conscious of what’s fueling or affecting your mood. Consider the choices you can make to create an enhanced experience, and don’t hesitate to cut ties with things that weigh you down or feel heavy.
Focus your energy on gaining clarity and intention around the things that are life-giving and bring in more healthy, abundant life force energy.
I’d love to hear your takeaways from today’s episode. What’s fueling your mood in positive ways? Share your thoughts and experiences with our community. As for me, I’m excited to see what choices I’ll make today as a result of our wise walk.
In this episode:
[01:23] Last episode we talked about the importance of retreating and recognizing signs and steps we need to move in a different direction.
[02:01] I received a lot of feedback on this episode. A common theme was the idea of feeling heavy.
[03:35] Intentional Listening, Music’s Power as a Channel of Communications a TEDx at Livermore talk by Donna Stoering.
[04:17] Music can heal our mood for the positive or the negative and so much more.
[07:02] There’s a lot to be said for using music as a channel of communication.
[09:22] I’ve also been using music to shift my energy. There’s dance music that really brings me joy like Pitbull radio on Spotify.
[10:25] I’m also being very conscious about what I’m watching.
[11:13] It’s scientifically proven that music can spark brain activity.
[14:38] There are so many outside influences that affect our mood including food and exercise which can all affect us at a cellular level.
[15:09] I’m cutting stuff from my life that feels heavy, because I don’t want to feel this way.
Memorable Quotes:
- “Music does have healing abilities and you can see music as a channel for joy and sadness. You know, if we’re going through grief, there’s different music that might help us cry and release that grief.” – Mary Tess
- “I don’t need to absorb any negativity that I don’t want in my life related to whatever I’m experiencing.” – Mary Tess
- “There was specific music I would listen to in order to feel like I was connected more deeply to that writing flow.” – Mary Tess
Links and Resources:
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Intentional Listening, Music’s Power as a Channel of Communications
EP203: What Does Retreat Mean to You?
This has been a super challenging and draining week for me. At first, I tried to push through, struggling with a long to-do list while feeling stuck in mud or sludge. Everything felt heavy and hard. It took time to accept my situation, as my mind clung to all I wanted to accomplish.
This episode is about retreat. What it means to you, and signs that it’s time to do so. Some of the things I discuss include recognizing the signs that tell us it’s time to pause, reassess, and find a better path forward. These signs can be subtle – like lacking energy for activities we usually love, feeling short-tempered with those close to us, or sensing we’re stuck in an emotional quagmire.
Sometimes, retreat looks like a peaceful, zen-like experience where we create space to realign with ourselves. Other times, it feels more like escaping from overwhelming situations. Either way, retreat gives us permission to step back from our normal routines and the expectations we place on ourselves.
When I finally released those expectations and decided to prioritize rest, retreat, and self-care, things began to feel lighter day by day. For today’s wise walk, I thought we would slow down and we would check our reality and ask ourselves these questions:
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- Do you know what signs indicate that you need to rest or retreat or regroup?
- Do you have a consistent pattern of recognizing those signs?
- Do you give yourself permission to feel and listen to them?
- And then what steps do you take to honor where you are?
- Do you actually know what your well-being needs to retreat and to slowly make strides in the right direction?
- Do you recognize when retreat would be a healthy choice for you?
- Are you aware of situations that you’ve experienced recently where those signs have cropped up and maybe you need to implement some self-care, self-love and self-acceptance so that you can find another direction to move forward?
- It doesn’t mean you’re giving up on your dream, but what’s a way you can save yourself some strife or internal conflict in order to reposition yourself and set yourself up for success in a different way?
- What are the opportunities you can give yourself to change perspective, to shift that energy and incorporate retreat in a blissful environment, sanctuary space that you could create for yourself? Basically, where do you seek refuge when you know that there is a life circumstance that is weighing you down and you need to retreat from?
- How can you honor and accept that feeling?
- Where can you create more space and grace in your life, and withdraw from the normal activities so you can have more peace during your major transition or when you feel emotionally stuck?
- What are other healthy choices that you can make that will support you instead of sabotage you?
I hope you’ll take away from this episode the importance of being mindful of your signs when you need to retreat. Once you notice those signs, consider what practices you can put in place to create space and grace for yourself, allowing you to feel lighter even during heavy times.
I’m grateful you listened to this vulnerable share. No one likes to admit they had a bad week, but I did. I love that we can connect – or reconnect – on this level and continue to support each other along the way.
Please tune in to next Thursday’s Wise Walk. I don’t know what it will bring, but I’m excited to see what unfolds for both you and me. As you enter this next week, remember to prioritize fun as you read the signs, direct your path, and get your stride on.
In this episode:
[03:03] – When you look at the stress or the weight of the conflict you’re in and the only thing to do is to acknowledge it and retreat for your own well-being.
[03:39] – “We are not retreating. We’re advancing in another direction.” General Douglas MacArthur
[04:10] – Retreat doesn’t mean failure.
[05:00] – Knowing when to retreat are signs that come up and say, hey you better stop and figure out a better path forward.
[05:37] – Mary Tess talks about warning signs and red flags, including not having the energy for what she normally loves to do and being really short with something she loves, like her dog.
[07:07] – Another sign when I’m going through a major transition or have just exited a transition is knowing that I’ve given all of my energy to that transition. Also, feeling stuck or depressed.
[08:55] – The word retreat has different meanings and also different visualizations.
[09:21] – The peaceful zen retreat experience is very positive. You are creating space to get back in touch with yourself and in alignment.
[10:34] – This past week I felt like I was getting hammered and had to escape from a very difficult situation. I had to accept it and release the expectations of what I thought I would get done this week.
[11:29] – I was stuck on an emotional level and felt like I needed to retreat from difficult situations.
[12:59] – Think about moments in your life when you feel tired and overwhelmed and give yourself permission to retreat and choose another direction.
[15:48] – You do what you do in order to manage the chaos that you are feeling.
[16:46] – When we retreat from our normal activities, and the expectations we put on ourselves, then we have more space to just feel lighter.
Memorable Quotes:
- “We acknowledge when we can’t just push through and push forward and will our way to be. Sometimes we have to regroup and then look at alternative paths or look at alternative options in order to move in alignment with ourselves” – Mary Tess
- “Once we accept where we are, once we acknowledge what we’re facing, then and only then can we decide to move in a different direction. Then we can make different choices for ourselves.” – Mary Tess
- “If I just feel stuck or depressed, these are big flashing warning signs for me to retreat, to regroup, and figure out what’s another path or direction I can take in order to regain my momentum and my stride.” – Mary Tess
Links and Resources:
EP202: Weathering Storms
Wherever you are in geographical space, I hope that you are not weathering any literal or metaphorical storms right now. But if you are, I think this episode might interest you because I’m in the midst of managing a literal hurricane approaching Florida, Hurricane Debby. Also, I am metaphorically going through a big transition, and it feels like I’ve been managing a storm for a while now.
When a storm is heading your way, do you recognize the emotional and physical things you’ll need to prepare for, and do you make a plan to control what you can? Do you also accept what you can’t control? Because storms have a way of surprising us. We can only control so much, right? So, do you manage what you can and accept the things you can’t?
Storms can make us feel weighed down, but they also have a way of blowing through, passing over, or going around us. We don’t always know the full impact until they hit, whether it’s landfall or on an emotional level. But as long as we stay self-aware, go inward, and continue to take these wise walks, we will be able to manage them in a way that strengthens us.
If we focus on controlling what we can before the storm actually hits—whether that storm is literal or metaphorical—then we have the opportunity to clear out, to remove any obstacles or hazards that might cause chaos or damage. We can create a space that supports us through the storm, so when it finally passes, we emerge stronger and more resilient.
What better time for us to go on a wise walk today, slow down, check our reality, and ask ourselves some important questions about how we manage our storms—or how we weather them?
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- When a storm is heading your way, do you recognize the emotional and physical things to prepare?
- Do you make plans to control what you can and accept what you can’t control?
- Do you carve out time for self-care?
- Do you have structural things in place to feel supported during this chaotic or heavy experience?
- Do you have clutter-free zones?
- Have you taken care of paperwork that seems to be weighing you down?
- Are there things within your home environment that feel heavy, and can you move them out of the way?
- What are the things that you can control in your environment, whether that is physical or emotional, so that you feel really supported?
- Maybe as that storm is approaching you, maybe part of that is just eliminating things that you sign yourself up for?
- Are you going inward?
- Are you recognizing your emotions?
- Are you making a plan to minimize the impact of the storm to yourself as well as those around you?
- Are you staying informed?
- Are you staying connected with the community so that you can support each other and know what’s in your heart?
- Are you willing to say yes and no to those things that will help you through this period of transition in a way that feels most aligned?
- Are you going to be kind to yourself to learn from this experience and this storm that you’re currently weathering?
As we wrap up, remember that by controlling what we can before the storm hits—whether literal or metaphorical—we have the chance to clear out anything that might cause chaos or damage.
Our environment plays a big role in how we weather the storm, so take a moment to assess and manage your space. Whether you’re facing an actual hurricane or navigating an emotional storm.
Join this inspiring community to uncover a new sense of freedom, and be sure to follow and review the True Stride podcast as we continue to exchange our light and Heart Value with each other.
I would love to hear what you took away from today’s episodes. Feel free to reach out and tune in next Thursday as we go on another wise walk. Until then, please be sure to prioritize fun as you read the signs, direct your path, and get your stride on.
In this episode:
[00:04] – When a storm is heading your way, recognize the emotional and physical things that you’re going to need to prepare for. Control what you can control.
[07:54] – Part of my emotional storm preparation or planning is all about creating space in my home.
[11:23] – The ability to communicate or express yourself and stay connected, even if you are battening down the hatch, is super important for our well-being, for our sense of community, and for those around us that love us to know that we’re okay.
[15:08] – I have some inward practices that really support me, whether there’s a physical or emotional storm coming my way. I’m going to pull them out and make sure that I slow down.
[17:01] – While you face the storms, know that I’m sending lots of love and light your way. Until our next wise walk, please be sure to prioritize fun as you read the signs, direct your path and get your stride on.
Memorable Quotes:
- “We don’t always know the full impact until storms hit, whether it’s landfall or on an emotional level.” – Mary Tess
- “Storms can make us feel weighed down, but they also have a way of blowing through, passing over, or going around us.” – Mary Tess
- “If we focus on controlling what we can before the storm actually hits, then we have the opportunity to clear out, to remove any obstacles or hazards that might cause chaos or damage.” – Mary Tess
Links and Resources:
EP201: Leading with Info & Intuition
This week has been one of those weeks, you know the kind where you get these intuitive hits, feel resistance in certain areas of your life, and find yourself wondering, “What am I supposed to do with this information? How do I move forward?” That’s exactly what I’ve been navigating lately.
I’m in the middle of a business deal, and at first, everything felt aligned—everyone seemed to be operating in good faith, coming to the table with transparency. It was that good feeling of mutual respect and honesty. But then, something shifted.
You know the feeling when the energy changes, and suddenly you realize the other party isn’t being upfront? They’re not coming to the table with the same integrity, and that’s when the alarm bells go off.
So, I had to take a step back and ask myself, “How do I protect my best interests in this situation?” Because at the end of the day, while we can’t control how others behave, we are responsible for how we show up and how we respond. We can only hope that others meet us at that same energetic level and reciprocate, but if they don’t, it’s up to us to pay attention to our emotions and act accordingly.
In today’s wise walk, I invite you to slow down with me and check our reality and ask
ourselves these questions:
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- When you intuitively feel like something is off, either in a business transaction or in some type of relationship or agreement that you made with yourself or with someone else, do you honor those feelings?
- Do you pay attention when you sense that something is off?
- When something feels off, do you communicate that, or do you figure out a way to protect yourself?
- Do you give yourself permission or freedom to choose again if your original plan or agreement is not in good faith?
- If someone is not operating in good faith with you, do you give yourself permission to pivot, saying, “Okay, it seems like this deal or opportunity has taken a unique turn, so what is my response to that”?
- When people show up differently than they did in the beginning, do you let that information in, process it, and move forward with your best intentions in mind?
- When was the last time you made an agreement or pursued an opportunity that initially felt in flow?
- Did you reach a crossroads where you started to question if it was right for you?
- Did you begin to doubt whether the other party had the best intentions?
- When you sensed a disconnect, did you stand up for yourself?
- Did you communicate that you felt a shift in the situation?
- What aspects of the transaction or opportunity left you with unanswered questions?
- As you sought answers, did you experience anxiety or unresolved feelings?
- If your concerns were ignored, how did you show up to protect yourself?
Join this inspiring community to uncover a new sense of freedom, and be sure to follow and review the True Stride podcast as we continue to exchange our light and Heart Value with each other.
I would love to hear what you took away from today’s episodes. Feel free to reach out and tune in next Thursday as we go on another wise walk. Until then, please be sure to prioritize fun as you read the signs, direct your path, and get your stride on.
In this episode:
[6:47] – Asking listeners to reflect on a time when they were pursuing an opportunity that initially felt right but later led to questioning the other party’s intentions.
[8:46] – Discussing a preference for direct communication with the source in business deals, rather than relying solely on lawyers, as long as conversations remain productive.
[10:18] – Explaining the decision to reach out to a lawyer to understand contractual responsibilities and options when communication with the other party broke down.
[11:34] – Acknowledging the need to speak with the lawyer to understand responsibilities and options before making a decision.
[12:06] – Emphasizing the importance of slowing down and gathering information as a position of power, using both the brain and heart to make decisions.
[13:06] – A personal anecdote about my mother who was a lawyer but always sought to mediate and encourage communication outside the courtroom.
Memorable Quotes:
- “We can show up with our best selves and hope that they meet us on an energetic level and they reciprocate. But we are still responsible for how we feel and paying attention to those emotions and energies.” – Mary Tess
- “When communication breaks down, when information becomes limited, that’s when leaders make bad decisions. And you are a leader in your life. You are the main character, the heroine or the hero of your life.” – Mary Tess
- “We as humans, we know what is right inside of us. And if we’re dealing with someone that is showing up with the best of intentions for themselves and for me, the other party, and for the transaction, if you will, then we should be able to come to reasonable agreements.” – Mary Tess
Links and Resources: