Your value is an accrual of experiences! Embrace the good, the bad, the ugly and the downright complicated to awaken your joy!
– Mary Tess Rooney
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EP290: Growing Into Your Vision & Future Self
My dear friend’s son, Doston, just got a German Shepherd puppy. She is small, curious, and already testing boundaries in all the ways puppies do. It is that early stage where behavior is still forming, and it would be easy to overlook the habits that are starting to take shape.
I admire how Doston reached out and asked me for advice on how to train her. How to set things up so she grows into a well-behaved, confident dog. That kind of awareness matters. It is easy to get caught up in the moment and assume things will work themselves out, but they do not. Puppies grow quickly, and the behaviors that seem minor in their youth become much more significant over time. When I think about my own dogs today, calm and easy to manage in different environments, I know that outcome came from consistent effort and a clear vision of who I wanted them to become.
That idea has stayed with me, because it extends far beyond dogs. The way we show up today directly influences the person we become over time. It is easy to feel stuck or feel that change is hard and it is too late to shift direction, but I do not see it that way. On today’s Wise Walk, we are taking a closer look at the future version of ourselves that we want to grow into and what it means to begin training for that version now.
- Who do you want to become, and is there a future version of yourself you can see or feel within you that you are ready to begin training for now?
- What qualities and experiences define that version of you, and what small steps can you take to begin moving in that direction and embodying those shifts today?
- Are your current actions aligned with the version of yourself you want to become?
- What elements in your environment can you control to better set yourself up for success?
- What steps, however small, do you know you need to take to move forward and begin acting as if you are already becoming that person?
- Are you staying true to those actions because you know they are right for you, regardless of what others may think?
- Can you hold space for your growth and commit to it, even if it feels uncomfortable or unfamiliar?
- Is there a past version of yourself you miss or want to reconnect with, and what from that version can you bring into your present and future?
- What small steps are you willing to take right now to grow into that person?
- What distractions or barriers can you remove to better support your progress?
- What actions can you take each day to stay aligned with the version of yourself you are ready to step into?
Each of us has the ability to create the life we are meant for. It starts with staying true to who we are today, while also honoring the version of ourselves we are growing into, and taking actions that align along the way.
I would love to hear what resonated with you, so feel free to reach out and share what you are taking with you from today’s episode. I look forward to being with you again next Thursday for another Wise Walk.
In this episode:
- [03:54] I had a simple but clear vision for my life with my dogs. It took a lot of work training them to be comfortable with travel and being a car dog.
- [05:08] I had to start with small steps like driving down the street.
- [06:01] Now the car is the happy place for both of my dogs.
- [07:03] I had to see the vision, set us up for success, and control distractions. Controlling the environment can set us all up for success.
- [08:10] I was mindful to condition my puppies to set them up for success. I started the training at a young age, so they could grow into the version I saw for them.
- [10:41] All of my actions were aligned with my vision for them.
- [12:09] One of the visions for my future self is hiking at higher elevations. I’m going to have to work up to that. I have a training plan for my big hike in July.
- [15:19] I’m so proud of my nephew who has the vision to train and do an ironman competition. That’s a 2.4 mile swim, 112 bike ride, and a 26.2 mile marathon.
- [17:11] I’m going to show up and support my nieces and nephews when I can.
Memorable Quotes:
- “Growth happens when your actions start to align with the version of yourself you can already see.” – Mary Tess
- “If you can see that future version of yourself, then you can start acting in alignment with it today.” – Mary Tess
- “The question is not whether change is possible. The question is whether you are ready to begin.” – Mary Tess
Links and Resources:
EP289: Messages We Are Meant to Receive
There are moments when something finds you at just the right time. A quote, a phrase, a random text from someone you love, and it lands in a way that you weren’t prepared for. That happened to me this week. A loved one sent me a quote and I couldn’t stop thinking about it: “Healing is when you stop telling the story that broke you, and you start telling the story that rebuilt you.” Simple words, but they opened up a lot. About the stories we carry, the ones we share with others, the ones we replay in our own heads — and what those stories actually say about where we are.
Because the way we tell our story? It doesn’t lie. It reflects where we genuinely are in our healing, not where we wish we were or think we should be. On today’s Wise Walk, we’re slowing down to explore that shift from the story that broke you to the one that rebuilt you. We’re getting curious about the messages we receive and what they might be pointing us toward. Because in that curiosity, there’s room for real reflection, a little more compassion for ourselves, and genuine gratitude for how far we’ve actually come.
- When a message or quote stops you in your tracks and connects on a deep level, do you take time to get curious about why it resonates?
- Do you reflect on why a particular word, phrase, or sentiment has an impact on you at that moment?
- Do you consider how it has shown up in your past, how it applies right now, and how it might support you moving forward?
- What are the stories you are telling right now, to yourself and to others?
- As you tell that story, do you notice an emotional charge, a sense of still feeling hurt, disappointed, or broken?
- Are you handling yourself with compassion and giving yourself grace as you acknowledge where you still are in your healing?
- Are you on the road to healing, and how can you move toward telling your story from a rebuilt perspective?
- Or are you telling a story that was once heavy, but in this moment you realize just how far you have come?
- Can you give yourself credit for rebuilding and for allowing yourself to heal from whatever that experience was?
- What is a message, quote, or phrase you heard on a podcast or radio that deeply connected with you?
- What is it about that phrase that strikes a chord and where do you see it showing up in your own life?
- Can you hold compassion for who you were in the past, who you are today, and who you hope to become?
- Can you give yourself gratitude for prioritizing your healing and for growing into the next version of yourself?
This whole community is stronger together when we can honestly acknowledge where we’ve been and celebrate the rebuilding that followed.
As always, I would love to hear what you took away from today’s episode, so feel free to reach out. I look forward to joining you next Thursday. Until then, prioritize fun, read the signs, direct your path, and get your Stride On.
In this episode:
- [02:32] “Healing is when you stop telling the story that broke you, and you start telling the story that rebuilt you.”
- [03:42] When we’re in the thick of going through an emotional crisis, we think about how this could be happening to me or why is this happening or what did I do wrong? We tell the story from the emotional state and place of the victim.
- [05:05] I love how the stories we tell are a great framework for whether we’ve healed from our emotional crisis.
- [08:05] An emotionally charged story that always comes to mind for me is my divorce. It was a difficult, challenging, and complex experience.
- [09:02] The healing process of my divorce took a long time, because there were so many different facets.
- [10:06] When I received the quote, I realized that I have come a long way when it comes to my divorce experience. I am grateful for that.
- [11:17] When you receive a message that deeply resonates with you, take the time to reflect on why that strikes a chord within you.
- [13:23] Messages we receive are also an opportunity to have conversations with those that we love.
- [14:11] You can also discover why these quotes resonate with those you love.
- [16:40] How your loved ones reflect on the quote can tell you if they’ve healed. You can also see their growth through their reflections.
- [17:21] When you receive messages, get curious about how they may apply in your life or of those you love.
- [18:03] When healing occurs, the way we tell the story changes.
Memorable Quotes:
- “Any time we have growth or a shift, we should give gratitude for just how far we’ve come.” – Mary Tess
- “We can’t get someone to rebuild themselves. We just have to be compassionate listeners.” – Mary Tess
- “When we go through something very challenging and difficult, there could be many layers of disappointment or hurt or brokenness that need to heal. We need to give ourselves compassion in that moment to heal and rebuild.” – Mary Tess
Links and Resources:
EP288: Adaptive Resilience: Finding Strength in the Setback
Getting knocked off your feet has a way of bringing everything into focus. Whether it’s a physical setback or something deeper on an emotional level, those moments where you feel depleted can leave you wondering how long it’s going to take to feel like yourself again. I was recently in that place, recovering from a stomach virus that completely drained my energy, and it got me thinking about what it really means to rebuild not just physically, but in all areas of life.
As I started to feel better, I couldn’t help but notice how the body naturally adapts, creating strength and protection behind the scenes. It made me realize that we have that same ability in our emotional and energetic lives, too. We’ve all been through hard things before, and somewhere along the way, we’ve built the resilience to move through them again. This episode is about recognizing that process and learning how to trust that as you rebuild, you can come back even stronger.
On today’s Wise Walk, we slow down and explore what resilience really looks like in our own lives and how we recognize those low moments. Also, how we support ourselves through them and draw on our own history to remind ourselves that this too shall pass.
- When you hit those low points, where you feel depleted or stuck, what memories can you tap into that remind you you’ve been resilient before and that this too will pass?
- As you reflect on an area of your life that needs attention right now, can you recognize what’s really going on and begin to reframe it into a growth moment instead of a setback?
- As you move through this experience, are you allowing yourself to reach out for support or permit yourself to take things off your plate?
- What can you let go of right now that isn’t serving you so you can feel lighter and begin to rebuild from a stronger place?
- Where can you acknowledge the strength and skills you’re gaining through this experience and remind yourself that you’re stronger than this moment?
- How do you remind yourself that this is temporary and that you’ve made it through hard things before?
- What does resilience look like for you right now, not in theory, but in how you’re actually showing up each day?
- Are you giving yourself enough self-compassion as you move through this, or are you expecting too much from yourself?
- Where might you be holding on to something that’s keeping you stuck instead of allowing yourself to move forward?
- Who in your life truly understands what you’re going through, and are you leaning into that support?
- What would it look like to trust that you are already rebuilding, even if it doesn’t feel like it yet?
- How can you ground yourself in this moment so you feel a little steadier as you move through it?
- What is one small step you can take today that supports your healing or your progress?
As we evolve, we begin to embrace this mindset of adaptive resilience. Whatever you’re going through right now, know that you have it within you. You can recognize it, reframe it, reach out for help, rid yourself of what isn’t serving you, and rebuild.
I’d love to hear what you’re navigating right now, and how you’re leaning into your natural resilience. Reach out, share your story, and know that you’re not alone. I look forward to next Thursday’s Wise Walk.
In this episode:
- [03:12] Our bodies are so miraculous. They have this high-functioning ability to adapt, even though we don’t always know how to support it.
- [04:10] As we fight an illness, our bodies adapt. They create antibodies that clear infections and store memory cells to fight future infections and attacks.
- [05:04] Our bodies are constantly learning, growing, and adapting to our environment. Our memory cells are on autopilot, constantly supporting us in the background.
- [06:55] We also rebuild on an emotional level. Our emotions and energy have a natural growth mindset.
- [08:12] Whatever we are managing at this moment will pass. I came up with five elements that will help us restore and overcome physically and emotionally.
- [09:12] I’m looking forward to establishing a home base and creating nesting roots.
- [10:06] 1. We have to recognize when we are in that moment of not feeling our best. What are the threats? How can we reframe this? What am I supposed to learn?
- [11:01] 3. Reach out and ask for help. You don’t have to do it alone.
- [12:22] 4. Rid yourself of anything that is not supporting you.
- [13:25] 5. Rebuild and become stronger than before.
- [14:05] If I get sick again, my memory cells will be able to recognize, reframe, reach out, rid, and rebuild.
- [15:13] One thing that has helped me when feeling ungrounded while searching for our home is to reach out to people who can support me.
- [17:09] I also know that I need to rid myself of influences that will make me feel worse about my situation.
- [18:06] This experience will help me rebuild in a stronger framework.
- [20:22] On an emotional and energetic level, where can we apply these five elements so that we can move through periods of transition and being stuck?
- [21:57] On a positive note, I’m feeling much better.
- [22:54] I love that we embrace the mindset of adaptive resilience as we grow and evolve.
- [23:14] Know that you have adaptive resilience and memory cells in your physical, emotional, and energetic body.
Memorable Quotes:
-
- “Your body knows how to rebuild. Sometimes the hardest part is trusting that you do too.” – Mary Tess
- “Even when you feel completely depleted, there’s something within you already working to restore and strengthen.” – Mary Tess
- “Resilience isn’t something you go find. It’s something you remember.” – Mary Tess
- “Your body rebuilds automatically. Your mind and heart just need a little more intention.” – Mary Tess
Links and Resources:
EP286: Rooted in Patience
As we approach springtime, I can already feel that anticipation and anxiety. This idea of okay, let’s get ready to rush, let’s get ready to move fast. This wanting, this desire to move out of the waiting place. Because winter kind of feels like a waiting place. This season of calmness, this season of slowing down. And then we hit spring and everything just moves a little bit faster.
I have a dear friend who is waiting for his house to sell. He has done everything right, including pricing it well and doing his homework; now he just has to trust that the right buyer will come at the right time. On the flip side, I am actively looking for a home, and I keep finding properties that are close but not quite right. As much as I want to just pull the trigger and move on, I keep coming back to this truth: when I have rushed things in the past, when I have been more impulsive, that is when I tend to make mistakes. That is when the unintended consequences show up.
On today’s Wise Walk, we’re going to slow down, check our reality, and explore how to truly embrace the power of waiting and what it can open up for us when we do.
- As you move into this new season, are you feeling rushed or are you managing your expectations with patience?
- Are you planting seeds in your life and then wanting them to bloom immediately?
- Are you appreciating the power of waiting and what it can open up for you?
- Where in your life are you feeling impatient right now?
- Is there something you are excited about but find yourself wanting to rush?
- When a big decision is in front of you, are you giving yourself enough time to truly sleep on it?
- Are you spending energy trying to control things that are simply not yours to control?
- What areas of your life are calling for your attention while you wait?
- What strategies are you using to remind yourself to trust the process?
- How are you shifting away from the pull of instant gratification and giving yourself space to sleep on it?
- Are you able to release the outcome once you have done everything you can?
- How are you looking to nature for inspiration to stay grounded when the impulse to rush starts to creep in?
I would love to hear what you took away from today’s episode and how you are applying patience in your life. The self-awareness you bring to your own journey inspires me and helps us all move through the seasons, whatever season we are in, with a little more grace.
Drop me a note and let me know what strategies are working for you, because I am always learning too. I look forward to joining you on next Thursday’s Wise Walk, so be sure to tune in. Until then, prioritize fun as you read the signs, direct your path, and get your Stride On.
In this episode:
- [02:47] A dear friend of mine listed his house on the market. The waiting is a painful process. He knows his best plan is to wait patiently.
- [04:57] I’m trying to find a home. I want at least two acres and no HOA (Home Owners Association).
- [06:06] I want the flexibility and freedom to change my situation if needed.
- [07:16] I found an amazing property, but there was an HOA. There’s a three-day rule for big decisions. We often get impatient.
- [08:24] Strategies for waiting include acknowledging the feeling, sleeping on it, creating space, and seeing if the sense of urgency is still as strong.
- [09:30] It’s okay, the right property will come up when it’s meant to be.
- [10:07] FOMO can create mistakes and regrets. We live in abundance and can always find another deal.
- [12:49] Another strategy I’m using is shifting my focus to another part of my life.
- [13:13] I need to put my energy in areas of my life that I can control.
- [14:01] Last year, my word of the year was co-create. This year, I chose the word bloom. I’m looking for inspiration from nature, and nature will bloom in its own due time.
- [15:24] A cool thing about this strategy is that other areas of my life are getting the attention they need.
- [16:01] When we release the impatience that we’re feeling, we create space to put our energy into other areas that matter.
- [16:32] My friend has put everything in place to attract the right buyer. Now he is releasing it and going to Paris while it sells.
- [17:04] I hope you’re employing strategies to manage the impatience and waiting.
Memorable Quotes:
- “The right opportunities will unfold at the perfect time, just as springtime arrives at the perfect time.” – Mary Tess
- “When we release the impatience we are feeling, we create space to put our energy on the things that matter.” – Mary Tess
- “We live in abundance. That will never be the last good deal, the last great view, the last right opportunity.” – Mary Tess
- “Waiting is not wasted time. It is a skill, and when you master it, it gives you a gift you cannot always explain.” – Mary Tess
Links and Resources:
EP285: Courage to Embrace Change: Small Steps = Big Shifts
As a follow-up to last week, I chose to attend my friend’s 50th birthday party and go all in on that experience, and I’ll tell you what, it totally paid off. We danced, we laughed, we had some sentimental moments. It was just a beautiful thing. I haven’t danced in a long time and I love dancing, so it was really fun to connect with myself, and I felt even more connected to my friend and her family too.
And here’s the thing, I got inspiration at that party. I was talking to my dear friend’s sister, Ingrid, and she was sharing how much she loved her new gig. She had been a school teacher and now she’s working in corporate America, and to see her on the other side of that major shift, was powerful. She just looked vibrant and happy. Her choice to reinvent her career path and the action she put behind it, that is the essence of embracing change with courage.
So on today’s Wise Walk, let’s slow down and consider how you are facing changes in your life. Are you able to face them with courage, with tenacity, with self-belief? Because I truly believe that when you embrace change with the courage that already exists within you, you will get to the other side.
- Can you tap into the brave part of yourself and trust that if you embrace change with courage you will get to the other side?
- How are you supporting yourself as you explore the change you are being called toward?
- Whatever change you are seeking, whether it is career, relationship, a move, retirement, a hobby, or something else entirely, can you hone in on your intention?
- What is driving you to embrace this change?
- Can you find a way to move forward with courage, bravery, self-belief, and tenacity?
- Can you look at where you are today and commit to taking just one small step?
- Can you acknowledge just how far you have come with each step you have already taken?
- Can you recognize the power of your own ability to get unstuck when you feel stuck?
- If you do feel stuck right now, what is one thing that will support you in seeking the freedom and true independence that comes from within?
Thank you for taking this Wise Walk with me and for sharing your stories. I love how when we come together and get vulnerable, we give each other the gifts of self-belief, tenacity, and courage to move forward.
So tap into that deep inner knowing and muster up the courage to take just one small step today, whatever that looks like for you. And until next Thursday, prioritize fun, read the signs, direct your path, and get your Stride On.
In this episode:
- [04:01] There are many times in our life where we may feel stuck. When it’s time to implement change, we need to be careful with how we think about it and who we let influence our decisions.
- [05:10] Embracing change can be scary. We have internal struggles and opposing external sources influencing us.
- [06:08] True freedom comes from doing our own thing and following our heart. We have the freedom to choose and pivot.
- [07:22] Fear can show us that it’s something we actually care about. Taking one small step at a time can lead to big shifts and big results.
- [10:16] If Ingrid is listening, please take this time to acknowledge yourself and the life you’ve created. Thank you for the inspiration.
- [11:03] I’m also facing a change and planning to look at property in Northern Georgia. I’m drawn to this area for multiple reasons.
- [12:31] I’m going to immerse myself in the community, look at properties, and keep taking small steps.
- [13:08] I’m protecting this intention and not sharing it with just anybody. You Striders are important.
- [16:17] “I never lose. I either win or learn.” Nelson Mandela
- [17:05] When we embrace change, we don’t lose. We win when we better ourselves.
- [18:39] If I go through a change and make a major shift in life, I can always pivot if it doesn’t play out the way I want.
Memorable Quotes:
-
- “True freedom comes from doing our own thing. When we follow our heart, set an intention, and follow through, that is very freeing.” – Mary Tess
- “Anytime I have fear, I go, okay, this is scary, but I know that this is also important to me. When I get that fear response, it means this is something I actually care about, something I really want.” – Mary Tess
- “We are so busy taking those small steps that we forget to acknowledge just how far we’ve come.” – Mary Tess
- “You already have what you need. Go after whatever your heart is calling you to do and see what’s possible for yourself.” – Mary Tess
Links and Resources:
EP284: Commit to One Opportunity, Without FOMO
Have you ever said yes to something that felt like a full-body, no-doubt-about-it yes and then almost immediately, another opportunity showed up that you were equally excited about? That has been my world lately. And honestly, as much as I love having options, there is something quietly exhausting about standing at a crossroads when both paths genuinely appeal to you.
What I’ve been noticing is that the pull to do it all, to find some creative way to say yes to everything, doesn’t always come from ambition. Sometimes it comes from not wanting to miss out, or from not wanting to let anyone down including yourself. But I’ve been learning, slowly and sometimes the hard way, that trying to be in two places at once often means you’re not truly present in either one.
So on today’s Wise Walk, I’m inviting you to slow down with me and get honest about what it actually feels like to choose one thing and let the other go with intention, without guilt, and without the weight of regret. Because there’s real power in going all in on the one thing your heart is calling you toward.
- How are you getting grounded in order to make the best choice for you in this moment, in the you that exists right now?
- How are you going through the process of dropping into your heart or checking in with yourself enough to get clarity?
- How are you following up with yourself to release that other opportunity and not doubt it or have regrets?
- What does this experience look like for you right now, and are there opportunities to refine it so you get better and better at following your heart?
- When you’re torn between two opportunities, what are the ways you are staying true to yourself and not getting caught up in FOMO?
- When can you say no because you’re choosing your own sanity and choosing to be fully present for the one experience you’re going all in on?
- Can you trust that if another opportunity needs to be part of your experience, something similar if not better will present itself at a later date?
- Is no for now okay, and can you just let it go?
- How often do savvy marketing strategies create fear or anxiety of missing out, and are you able to distance yourself enough to ask if you’d still say yes next month?
- What is the best use of your time and energy in this moment?
- How do you handle it when a dear loved one is the one creating that pressure to show up?
- Are you staying grounded in how you show up and not spreading yourself too thin?
- What does it feel like when you say no for now and choose your sanity, your peace, and your harmony?
- Are you giving yourself credit for being intentional about directing your energy toward what matters most to you?
Wherever you are and whatever’s unfolding in your life right now, I hope you’re showing up fully energized, present, and excited about what you’re saying yes to. And for the things you’re saying not right now to, I hope you’re holding those with anticipation rather than regret.
It goes a long way. I’d love to hear what you took away from today’s episode, so feel free to reach out, and I’ll see you next Thursday for another Wise Walk.
In this episode:
- [02:58] I’m super excited because my friend’s 50th birthday party is coming up this weekend. It’s important for me to show up for her.
- [04:02] Then I was invited to attend a workshop on the same weekend. This Workshop is something that I would be excited to learn, and it’s also a rare opportunity. I had to reflect on if I could do both things.
- [05:07] Would I be able to enjoy the party if I had to fly at the crack of dawn to do both? I felt anxiety rising in me when I thought about this question.
- [06:03] The thought of doing both made me feel exhausted. I ended up saying no to the workshop.
- [07:09] When I try to do too much in too short of a period, I don’t show up as my best self.
- [11:00] It’s funny because in my life, I feel like when I need to learn a lesson, this happens more often than not.
- [12:22] When I have opportunities competing with my time, I’m getting better at saying I can’t do both and not putting pressure on myself.
- [13:47] I’m choosing not to get swept up in the energy of fear of missing out.
- [15:20] I also want to take this moment to thank you. All of the Wise Walks that we go on creates a safe place for me to reflect. You have helped me to go inward and be intentional.
Memorable Quotes:
-
- “I don’t have to buy into that fear of missing out. I don’t have to let that influence my decision because my decisions affect me.” – Mary Tess
- “Anytime I try to do too much in too short of a period, I am not showing up as my best self.” – Mary Tess
- “I want to enjoy life. I really want to show up in meaningful ways for myself and for those that I love.” – Mary Tess
- “I’m getting better at making choices that say — I can’t do both, I don’t want to do both, I don’t want to put that pressure on myself.” – Mary Tess
Links and Resources:
EP283: Finding Growth Inside Bittersweet Moments
There are moments in life when something can feel completely right and heavy at the same time. That’s the space I’ve been sitting in lately. We recently sold our camper van, and while I know this decision aligns with where I am in this season, I’d be lying if I said it didn’t stir up a surprising mix of emotions. Gratitude, nostalgia, sadness, relief, excitement. They’ve all been showing up, sometimes within minutes of each other.
What this experience has reminded me is how often endings and beginnings travel together. Rarely do we get one without the other. And even when we consciously choose change, there can still be grief, doubt, or that strange bittersweet feeling that’s hard to put into words. This conversation explores what it means to make space for those emotions rather than rushing past them, and today’s Wise Walk invites you to reflect on the transitions unfolding in your own life.
- Are you giving yourself permission to feel your emotions without judgment as you move through transitions?
- Can you acknowledge both the excitement and the heaviness that may be present at the same time?
- Are there feelings of loss, doubt, or uncertainty that need space and recognition?
- Can you process these emotions in a way you can clearly articulate and share with someone you trust?
- What identity, role, or chapter of your life feels like it is coming to an end?
- Which emotions feel most present for you right now?
- What feels heavy or difficult to release?
- What about this transition feels hopeful, relieving, or exciting?
- Can you sit with this ending long enough to honor who you were in that phase of life?
- What did you value, learn, or gain from that version of yourself?
- Where have you grown through this experience?
- What no longer serves you as you step into your next chapter?
If you’re moving through a transition right now, I hope you remember to be kind and gentle with yourself. And if someone you love is navigating change, your patience and support can mean more than you realize.
I’m still in the process of working through my own bittersweet emotions, and I look forward to sharing the new beginnings ahead. Until next time, keep honoring your journey, prioritize fun, and get your stride on.
In this episode:
- [05:14] Sometimes in the past, when I worked really hard to achieve something, I didn’t feel like I was allowed to acknowledge any emotions that didn’t match that goal.
- [06:04] My bittersweet emotions about selling the van also need to be acknowledged.
- [07:15] Saying goodbye to the van is like saying goodbye to a dear friend. It’s natural to feel grief and happiness.
- [08:06] I know I need to release the heavy emotions I have about selling the van.
- [09:02] Navigating transitions is complex for all of us. We can be happy and sad for different reasons. We can have bittersweet experiences where both emotions exist.
- [10:49] Bittersweet feelings come up in every transition in life. Instead of judging or dismissing them, try to get comfortable with them.
- [11:13] Embrace and express your emotions in a way where you can get closure.
- [12:14] Feeling our complex feelings of beautiful, sad, or joyous helps us honor and process them.
- [13:29] Letting go of the van was emotionally heavy, but I know there are good things in store for me and the dogs.
- [14:40] This transition gives me less things to worry about and helps me be more grounded.
- [15:25] We’ll still be going on adventures together, and that’s the most important part.
- [16:11] I’m glad we’re on a Wise Walk today talking about bittersweet emotions and how we can befriend them and offer support for ourselves.
- [17:34] Allowing our feelings to flow and expressing them helps us be our authentic selves.
- [18:48] Once we bring closure to an aspect of our lives, we have more space to step into a new beginning.
Memorable Quotes:
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- “Closure isn’t always about intellectually understanding everything. Sometimes it’s about allowing the emotional experience to move through us.” – Mary Tess
- “Something can be absolutely right for your life and still feel surprisingly difficult to release. Those two truths can exist together without meaning you made the wrong decision.” – Mary Tess
- “An ending doesn’t diminish the beauty, the joy, or the meaning of what came before it. It simply marks that a chapter has run its course.” – Mary Tess
- “Every ending, whether we welcome it or resist it, quietly carries the seed of a new beginning we may not yet fully understand.” – Mary Tess
Links and Resources:
EP282: Are You a Really Lucky Human Too?
I’ve said the phrase “I’m a really lucky gal” for most of my life, and interestingly, I often say it right after someone tells me no. Not because rejection feels good, but because somewhere along the way, I stopped believing that no automatically means never.
Recently, that mindset was put to the test while I was preparing to sell my Mercedes Sprinter camper van. I wanted to have it serviced before completing the sale, but the dealership told me appointments were booked months out and cancellations basically never happen.
Still, I stayed optimistic, kept the lines of communication open, checked in consistently, and made sure I was ready in case an opportunity appeared. And sure enough, one did. What unfolded was more than just a scheduling win. It became a reminder of how mindset, communication, and action quietly work together to shift outcomes.
In this episode, we talk about what it really means to think of yourself as “lucky,” how persistence differs from pressure, and why preparation often plays a bigger role than we realize. Today’s Wise Walk centers on your relationship with rejection, possibility, and the small but powerful ways you can actively participate in changing your own luck.
- How many times have you been rejected after putting yourself out there for something you truly wanted, and you chose to move on simply because you received an answer?
- How often do you respond to rejection with the belief that it may be “no for now,” but you keep the door open for future possibilities?
- When you face a setback, do you maintain an optimistic mindset that good fortune can still find its way to you?
- Are you able to communicate your desires clearly and respectfully without placing demands on others?
- Can you expand your network by staying open, engaged, and connected with people who may help shift outcomes?
- Are you preparing yourself to act when opportunities arise rather than waiting until after things change?
- What actions are you willing to take today to create openings that do not yet appear visible?
- Can you strengthen your luck mindset by aligning belief, communication, and consistent action?
- Are you allowing yourself to appreciate the process, including the small wins and unexpected moments along the way?
- When things finally shift in your favor, do you pause to feel gratitude and genuine appreciation?
Hopefully, that gratitude mindset can help us move through the rough patches and those feelings of stuckness, reminding us that, in general, the energy does shift.
As always, I’d love to hear what you took away from today’s episode, so feel free to reach out and share. And be sure to tune in next Thursday for another Wise Walk.
Until then, please remember to prioritize fun as you read the signs, direct your path, and get your Stride On.
In this episode:
- [02:46] I’m in the process of selling my 2019 Mercedes Sprinter camper van. I plan to get it serviced at the Mercedes dealership before selling it.
- [04:12] This reduced the anxiety level of the new owner as well. My appointment was booked for February 20th, but we needed an earlier appointment.
- [05:04] They were booking several months out and were already all booked up. I’m a lucky gal! Put me on the cancellation list.
- [07:01] I kept a positive mindset and kept checking in. On one of my check-ins there was a no-show. I really am a lucky gal.
- [09:05] Getting this done ahead of schedule makes the transaction even more smooth. I also made a new friend and built rapport.
- [10:04] This boils down to three key components. First is mindset. I have a mindset that I’m a really lucky gal.
- [11:03] I also communicate, and I’m not afraid to get a no answer. Every no is one step closer to a yes. Action and preparing myself are also part of this plan.
- [12:03] I had to be ready to take action when I got that yes.
- [13:31] My mom always said that your luck factor increases depending on how many individuals are in your network.
- [15:20] I’ve used this mindset in many different areas of my life. For instance I knew things would work out when I sold my St. Augustine home.
- [16:44] I know that luck is when preparation meets opportunity. The more I prepare for an outcome I seek, the more likely it will happen.
- [17:40] Sometimes it’s hard to be patient when you have a mindset of good fortune, and things aren’t going your way.
Memorable Quotes:
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- “Luck, in my life, has rarely felt like random chance, and much more like the result of mindset, clear communication, and taking action long before the outcome actually shifts.” – Mary Tess
- “Preparation is one of the most underrated forms of optimism, because it reflects the belief that something will eventually work out, even when there’s no immediate evidence that it will.” – Mary Tess
- “I’ve discovered that keeping the lines of communication open often creates opportunities that would never exist if I simply accepted the first no and walked away.” – Mary Tess
- “Gratitude plays a powerful role in sustaining resilience, because when you remember past wins, it becomes easier to trust that future shifts are still possible.” – Mary Tess
Links and Resources:
EP281: Values to Guide Clarity and Direction
The past week felt like it stayed with me longer than I expected. After getting back from New York and everything surrounding my Aunt Ronnie’s service, I noticed I was still sitting with that feeling of surrender I talked about in the last episode. There were so many moving parts with the travel and the weather, and even though everything worked out, I could feel how tired I was from trying to hold it all together. What helped was coming back, again and again, to what I could actually control, and letting the rest be what it was.
As I was settling back into my routine, I started thinking about alignment and how I find my footing when things feel uncertain. I’m always learning, always taking something new in, and recently I started a course on the Celtic Wheel of the Year. On the very first call, we were invited to look at our values, and I’ll be honest, I didn’t think much would come up. As I sat with it, I realized some of my values have changed because I’ve changed. That clarity felt grounding in a way I didn’t expect. On today’s Wise Walk, I invite you to slow down and spend some time with the values that are guiding you right now, and notice how they may be shaping the way you’re moving through this season of your life.
- What values feel most important to you right now, whether that’s your top ten or just a few that truly stand out?
- What qualities do you most admire in others, and how do those reflect the values you hold?
- Which values are guiding you in this present moment, especially as you move through uncertainty or challenge?
- How are these values helping you envision the person you are becoming?
- What values feel connected to who you are right now and who you want to be moving forward?
- How do these values shape your choices, actions, and daily habits?
- In what ways do your values act as motivators that help you go after what matters most to you?
- How are your values showing up in your life right now, both in visible and subtle ways?
- How can your values serve as living guides that support your highest and best self?
- How do your values define you when you are at your best?
- How do your values influence the way you show up in relationships with others?
- How can you honor shared values in your relationships while allowing space for others to live those values in their own way?
- Where might greater clarity around your values help you communicate boundaries or make agreements with others?
- How can you create more alignment and mutual respect in your relationships by naming what truly matters to you?
- How can you apply your values awareness to your career or daily work?
- Are there areas in your career or relationships where something feels off or out of alignment?
- When you notice imbalance or discomfort, how can you return to your values as a compass to guide your next choice or action?
I’d love to hear what values are guiding you right now. Whether it’s your top ten or just one or two that feel especially alive for you, notice how you’re holding space for them in this season and how they’re shaping the choices you’re making.
Thank you so much for being here and for showing up with such openness and self-awareness. I’ll meet you back here next Thursday for our Wise Walk, and until then, prioritize fun, read the signs, trust your path, and get your Stride On.
In this episode:
- [03:23] How the Celtic Wheel of the Year is just another opportunity for us to align with the universe, seasons, and the flow of nature.
- [04:26] As I defined my values, I realized that over time some of them have shifted. Knowing your values serves as a living guide for all of us.
- [06:12] As I went on my own Wise Walk, I realized that focusing on my values was more difficult than I thought. It took me a while to target my top 10.
- [07:02] Kindness is a fallback value for me. I also love being of service to others. Love and gratitude are very connected, but I honed in on love.
- [08:16] Other big ones for me include learning and growth, adventure in nature, and openness. Balance and freedom were also very important to me.
- [09:16] I also wanted to show up authentically as myself. Health is also a priority and part of my top 10.
- [11:20] My top 10 are kindness, service, love, learning, adventure in nature, openness, balance, freedom, authenticity, and health.
- [13:10] One of my values is health. This is also the value of many of my friends, but the way health shows up is unique for each of us.
- [15:48] I was speaking with a client about career values and growth. They’ve now admitted that this isn’t a value that they’re passionate about anymore.
- [16:55] They now have a career value of stability. Getting clear on this was very powerful.
- [18:24] Identifying my values as a living guide is going to increase my decision making and help me feel more aligned with my choices.
- [19:02] This exercise will also help reduce internal conflict or conflict with others.
Memorable Quotes:
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- “Living in alignment doesn’t mean life gets easier, it means you trust yourself more when it gets hard.” – Mary Tess
- “Your values are not rules to follow, they are reminders that bring you home to yourself.” – Mary Tess
- “Clarity comes when you stop asking what you should want and start listening to what truly matters to you.” – Mary Tess
- “When you live by your values, your choices begin to feel lighter and more intentional.” – Mary Tess
Links and Resources:
EP280: Finding Peace in What You Can’t Control
This past week really tested my need for control. I had a lot going on emotionally as I was getting ready to travel back to New York to honor the passing of my Aunt Ronnie. There was a snowstorm moving across the country, flights were being delayed and canceled, and plans kept changing. Emotions were already high, and with everything unfolding the way it was, I had to keep reminding myself that there were things outside of my control that I just had to accept.
As the week unfolded, I could feel anxiety start to creep in with all the unknowns. I can’t control the weather or the flights, but I can control how present I stay and how I choose to show up in the middle of it. This is a reflection on surrender and releasing that grip. I share a story from my teenage years as a lifeguard, helping a frightened little girl learn how to float, and how breath, trust, and letting go allowed her to be supported by the water. On today’s Wise Walk, I invite you to slow down and reflect on where you may be holding on too tightly, and become aware of what you can control or release to help you discover peace and freedom amidst the uncertainty.
- When you notice anxiety, stress, fear, or a lack of safety coming up, how much of that is a need for control, and how much might be a trigger from something else?
- Are you able to identify the root of that emotion and consider how you might respond differently so you can reduce anxiety, stress, or fear?
- How do you gain awareness and focus on the present, when you’re facing resistance or situations that are outside of your control?
- Is there an area of your life where you realize that you may be trying to control something that isn’t actually yours to control?
- As you take yourself on a Wise Walk, can you notice what’s triggering your stress and consider whether more realistic expectations might help you feel supported and grounded?
- Can you visualize yourself floating, breathing, and being supported by what’s around you, trusting that you are safe and worthy, exactly as you are?
- Are there tasks or goals in your life that are distracting you from where you want to go, or are they supporting you in feeling more at peace and showing up the way you want?
- Can you feel good about the small steps you’re taking so that even when things don’t go as planned, you know you that did what you could?
- If circumstances don’t allow you to show up in the way you originally intended, how might you still be present in a different way, whether in spirit, intention, or connection?
- Can you shift your energy away from needing things to happen in a very specific way and open yourself to new ways of participating through the things you can control?
It’s my hope that we can float together. That we can surrender, release, and find a little more peace, letting Mother Nature, the water, and the elements support us along the way.
As always, I’d love to hear what you took away from today’s episode, so please feel free to reach out and send me a DM.
I’m sending good thoughts your way and hoping that you feel supported in all the ways that really matter to you. I look forward to next Thursday’s Wise Walk.
In this episode:
- [03:44] When I was in high school I was a lifeguard at the Marriott Hotel. I remember helping a five-year-old girl who had a fear of floating.
- [05:55] I coached her on how to let go and to let the water do the work for her. She needed to release anxiety, stress, and control. The more she released her tension and grip, the easier it became for her to float.
- [06:19] This is true in life. If we’re resisting, we’re fighting against the grain. Accepting safety and support can appear in a way that we’re not used to.
- [07:01] The art of surrendering is what will keep us afloat. I needed to remind myself of this during this stressful week with so many factors coming into play.
- [08:08] The best thing I can do is surrender and do the things I can control. We need to see surrender as a strength. It’s not defeat.
- [09:20] I’m also separating from holding on too tightly, expecting things to happen the way that I want them to.
- [10:47] I feel safe and supported right now from the Universe and the individuals who decide whether it’s safe to fly or not.
- [11:08] I’m going to stay in my lane, and visualize myself floating in the water.
Memorable Quotes:
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- “There are things outside of my control that I just have to accept, and I have to do the best I can with what’s in front of me.” – Mary Tess
- “We can’t control the weather or the airlines or the flights, but we can control certain things in our life, and we can also surrender what we can’t control.” – Mary Tess
- “When we let go and release the attachment to what we think should happen, it allows us to move through things with more peace.” – Mary Tess
- “Trying to control things we can’t control just creates more stress, more anxiety, and more fear of uncertainty.” – Mary Tess
Links and Resources: